Pass it On: Be Kind

By Dennis Lantz

Passing on information to future generations is part of the human experience. We hand down our words, stories, values, actions and deeds to those who come after us. As technology advances, so do our legacies. Anyone who has seen cycles of violence and despair worm their way from one generation to the next knows that bad choices are just as easily passed along as good. My goal is to focus on the good.

The human endeavor is like building a mound with mixed sand and stone. Each generation continues the construction process and adds to the successes of those that came before. Sometimes we sink a little because we do not learn the lessons of the past, but generally we continue to climb higher.

When I started MY HANDPRINT, I wanted to share the beautiful parts of life… and there are many. I hoped to perpetuate the love and kindness that I have been given. I longed to show that the light we seek is worthy of our time. Focus your attention on what can be and the circumstances will make them reality.   

Actively passing along a worthy, non-monetary inheritance can be a powerful experience. You are a full participant in the human conversation. You seek evidence of where we came from and help determine where we are going. Two types of legacies are in play. The way you are personally remembered… and the advice you share with the next generations.

How do you want to be remembered? When your family and friends talk about you at your wake or funeral, or even many years after you have passed from this mortal realm… what do you want them to say? Do you want them to remember that you were kind? That you were funny? That you were family-oriented? Whatever it is that is important to your legacy, start by making choices that will get you there.  Former congressman Trey Gowdy recently declared here that…  if you want them to talk about you a certain way after you are gone, then you’d better actually be that sort of person. If you want them to say you were a bestselling author, then you’d better work toward becoming one. If you want them to say you were dedicated to your family, then you’d better be. He said to start at the end… and use that as a goal. If you aren’t what you wish to be at this moment, then you’d better start working on it today. 

More important to me (because I’ve never really cared what people say about me) is the desire to assist my younger family members and friends by giving bits of advice about life. I believe we learn from our mistakes and failures… but even better, we can learn from the mistakes and failures of others. If they can learn from mine, so be it.

A thousand years ago, when most printing was done by hand and complete books were premium and often one-of-a-kind, it was popular for members of the upper class or the newly emerging wealthy merchant class, to write books of advice to their children. Because life expectancy was shorter, many wanted to share ideas with those they would never know. Christy and I were not blessed with children, so I cannot pass my accumulation of ideas to them. We do, however, have a good number of nieces and nephews who might gain from those experiences.

If I were to write such advice, I would make each idea short and simple.

So, nieces, nephews, cousins and other members of family and friends who read this… always remember:

Be Kind: Kindness is its own reward, but when given, it returns tenfold. It’s not an aberration that the most common advice posted on The Healing Project’s Facebook site urges kindness and love.

Every single person you meet is dealing with an issue that you know nothing about. Be kind.

That is paraphrasing something that Brit Hume of Fox News said. I don’t know if he was the originator, but it struck me as important.

Anger, frustration, fear, worry, stress and pain are common today. We definitely give them too much power over our lives. I’m certain that kindness, patience, courage, peace and happiness… combined with love, compassion, joy and purpose are far healthier. 

You can’t always tell how someone feels. Some people wear their pain openly. Others hide it. There is no right way or wrong way; we deal with life the best we can. So I urge you to act out of kindness. It is the best way.

Take Care of Your Health: Appreciate the good health you have because sudden changes can occur. One day you might be the epitome of health… and the next you are facing a personal difficulty.

You are what you eat. Don’t eat toxins or foods that are detrimental to good health. Your body wasn’t designed to consume many of the foods or drinks that we are offered.

No one knows how long they will live, but exercise and sleep, along with disciplined eating and drinking habits can give you a better quality of life, however long the duration.  

Find your purpose: Each of us has internal desires and needs. When we meet them, our soul knows and responds with peace and satisfaction. I believe we each have a divine purpose. Agree or disagree with that premise, you will be far happier if you accomplish something meaningful with your time.

Live with integrity: Be honest with yourself. Be honest with others. Follow a moral code that is consistent and pure. It isn’t always the easiest path, but it is the most satisfying.

Think about the next generation: Many of the problems we face today are passed along to those who follow. They will be the same for every succeeding generation. Humans have basic needs. Among these are shelter, water, food and social connections. How we obtain these may change or evolve, but the fundamental need remains. The house I live in is not the same as those of my distant ancestors. The foods I eat and the fluids I drink are not the same. The social bonds are certainly different. But we each have them.

Live your life like the next generation will stand on your shoulders. Give them something that makes their life better. I’m not talking about national debt. I’m not even talking about a free society, although I encourage that. Freedom is inherent and liberty comes and goes. Give them your story so that they know you… and through that, better understand themselves.

I worry about the future. Too many will be saddled with special needs (adult) children. Too many will be working too hard to appreciate all the wonders of life. Too many good people are being used up and burned out.

The End of Life Paradigm: The last bit of advice I will give you in this column, is that ideas are far more important than you realize. Thought processes evolve… and not always in a positive way. The way we view our lives must change. The way we view the end of life has become less than glorious. I’m not talking just about the hereafter. I’m talking about getting there.

Once, the young dreamed of dying valiantly in battle or becoming a wise advisor to the younger generation. Today we grow old so that we can spend most of our money and time taking prescription medicine and retiring. We extend the length of life, but not the quality. This is the wrong mindset.

I can admire the idea of becoming a wise teacher. We should desire to make a difference in the lives of others. As I get older, I hope to give even more advice. It is up to you whether or not you should listen.

Follow Dennis Lantz Books on Facebook here. 

Until next time,

Read, Learn, Live

 


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Vivian Mae Humphrey West

Image
By Dennis Lantz Two years ago, while cleaning out the attic of the house I grew up in (on Ghent Hill, Sheshequin Township), I came across an old, cloth-bound, day journal that belonged to my grandmother… Vivian Mae Humphrey West. I did not know much about her life. She died quite young, only 24 years old, in 1941, almost twenty-nine years before I was born. I did not know this journal existed. My mother, Marlene Joanne West Lantz was only nineteen months old when her mother died. She never told me that she had the diary.   The brown and tan cover is stained, the ribbony latch is broken. When you open it, you see discordant writing on aged paper. Some ink, and some faded pencil. It is a five-year daily diary where the author is given just a few short lines for each day… and when they get to the end (December 31 st ) they then go back to the beginning to start the next year. Entries are, by necessity, brief. My grandmother wrote in cursive, but her handwriting was neat enough to read
Read more

My Hogan Journal

By Dennis Lantz In May of 1995, I went to live in the woods for the summer. Not the deep forest or wilderness, just the small tree patches on my family farm. I did not go alone to this natural sanctuary, which we called Gentlewoods. Mark stayed with me. Jon and others visited frequently. Those were different times. No one I knew had a cell phone. No Facebook, Google or Twitter tracked us, labeled us or caused us to reach out desperately for some small measure of momentary comfort.  Life was simpler. Life was good.   Many times in the twenty-five years since, I have contemplated writing a book about my experiences. I have my journals and could readily interview most of those mentioned within. But I haven’t… for various reasons. Some of the memories and thoughts are too personal. Others are too mundane. But the essence or spirit of that period in my life is too important not to share. So today I begin that process.     Over the upcoming months I will post some of those j
Read more

Lora Ethelina Horton Zeller Schraeder

Image
 By Dennis Lantz Last winter, during a cleaning session at the old farmhouse on Ghent, I came across a typed history from Lora Ethelina Horton Zeller Schraeder. In it, she tells stories about her life, as well as the lives of her parents and grandparents. I had never heard of her prior to finding her short autobiography. I still don’t know who she was. I hope some of my Horton friends can shed a light on her family connections. Horton was a common name on Ghent. In fact, they were the primary settlers in that region. I’m surprised it wasn’t called Horton Hill. After reading her story, I believe her grandfather’s home is now the Sensenig farm on the Ulster-North Rome Road, and that the Ghent school where she taught was at the corner of Shores Road and the Ulster-North Rome Road. (For the record, my father and several of my aunts and uncles went to this school… years later.) I don’t know why this journal was in my house. I found it in my mother’s belongings… so it likely had been giv
Read more